"I haven't been around much."

"Jack and I wondered why you hadn't contacted us." "I'm sorry," Jay apologized.

"Not happy?" Cheryl asked knowingly.

"We separated," Jay informed her. "No regrets."

"Messy?"

"No. No, nothing like that. Clara is understanding."

"How does Clara feel?"

"Oh, no love lost. There was really never anything between us. We were not like you and Jack."

"Jack and I had our differences," Cheryl confessed.

"I know that," Jay replied. "I've seen you two at each other's throats, but you loved each other. In spite of everything you had love. That you can't toss about lightly."

"You know something?" Cheryl smiled a smile that was meant to hold back the tears. "You're right," she said. "I know that now. I don't know what I'll do when he is gone."

99

"You haven't given up?"

"I've resigned myself to it. It is only a matter of time. I don't think he will last a week."

ciful."

"It's that bad?"

"Maybe it's better. I would hate to see him suffer. Sometimes God is mer-

"I'm terribly sorry, Cheryl," Jay said, reaching across the table and taking her hand into his. "If there is anything I can do?"

"Nothing to do," she assured him. "Only wait." After a pause she asked, "What about you and Clara?"

"She was dynamic. She has everything. She was a woman with vitality plus. She impressed me. I was selfish enough to think that she would be good for me."

"Then, why?"

"I wasn't the man for her. She needs someone who is aggressive. I wasn't forceful enough for her. She needs a guy that can boss her around. The average man, according to her views, is weak. We were doomed from the start."

"Jack and I always thought it was awful of you to leave Gerard. You two

got along so well. We thought..."

"Yes, we hit it off great. He was a wonderful roommate."

"Is that all?" Cheryl asked, adding, "Jay, I wasn't born yesterday."

"What do you mean by that remark?"

Cheryl observed the expression on Jay's face and she was aware of an almost childlike naivete of which she had never been conscious before.

"I'm sorry, Jay," she said. "Please, don't be offended."

"Is that what you and Jack thought?"

"Well, we never really discussed it; we just took it for granted."

"That Gerard and I ..

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"Are you certain that you don't have a deeper feeling for him than you think?" Cheryl interrupted.

14

"Sure! I miss him. We were close."

"Have you been in touch?"

"No."

"Then why don't you look him up?"